If your little one is growing out of their nap, but you aren’t ready to give up that much needed “quiet time” that we, as caregivers, all look forward to and need so very much at some point in our day, this post is for you!

That chunk of quiet time during the day is not only beneficial for us as caregivers, but there are also numerous benefits of continuing the routine with your littles. In this post I will cover:
- what is a “quiet time?”
- why quiet time is important (and why you shouldn’t feel bad about it!)
- tips for making the initial transition (from a nap to a quiet time) - this includes some “what NOT to do’s” as well because I’m on kid #2 and I’ve learned a lot through trial and error
- my best tip to achieve a 2 hour quiet time (or whatever length you desire and decide is best for your family)
- favorite open-ended toys, activities, puzzles, etc. that we use and how we organize them

What is a “quiet time?”

You may have also heard it called “room time” but they are essentially the same idea. A quiet time is just a chunk of time at some point during the day where everyone is in their own space, doing something quietly, independently. This time can be spent in a bedroom, in a playroom, or even in a main living space as long as they are playing quietly and independently. This is where you have to do what you feel is best and will work best for you and your family.

For us, we have had the most success having our kids in their own rooms, keeping consistent with whatever routine they previously had for an afternoon nap. At the time I’m writing this post, I have a 1st grader (Kade) who is at school all day, a 4.5 year old (Tatum) who goes to junior kindergarten (pre-k) every day until 11:50 AM, and a 2 year old (Coen) who takes an afternoon nap every day. Tatum does a daily quiet time in her bedroom after lunch from about 1:00 PM - 3:00 PM while Coen is taking his nap.

This was always the same time frame that Tatum would take her nap too, but in the last year or so she slowly started falling asleep less and less during this chunk of time, so the language we used changed, along with the expectations and what it all looked like.

What quiet time looks like for us now is also not what it looked like when I first started trying to implement a quiet time with my oldest the first time around. I’ll dive into this topic more later on in the post, however, I want to reiterate here that every child is different and will have different needs. My oldest rarely lasted a full 2 hours and he was a lot less independent than Tatum is now. More in a bit on what adjustments I made the second time around that I think have helped tremendously.

I will also add that on weekends, we do still encourage our oldest to partake in a little bit of a quiet time as well, however, he often ends up running errands with dad, or sometimes has play dates during this time. When it’s nice out, he also gets the option to spend time outside.

Why is quiet time important?

For me personally, on days that we are go-go-go with no quiet time in the afternoons, I feel it. I feel it big. The overstimulation of the day gets to be a lot and I often times end up with a headache or just an increased feeling of overwhelm. During the week, the quiet time for me goes very quickly because once I get Coen down for a nap, and Tatum set up for her quiet time, I typically make myself lunch, eat lunch, pack any orders from the last 24 hours, and then end up with about 30-40 minutes before it’s time to leave to pick up Kade from school (Kyle works from home so I leave him with the monitor and the littles continue their quiet time/nap while I pick him up).

It’s quick, but still very necessary. Just getting to make and eat lunch in peace is a huge part of it for me. It’s a time to wind down, catch up on messages and emails, and just be able to hear myself think (if you have little ones, I know you can relate)!

So aside from a quiet time being a much-needed and welcomed break from the busyness of motherhood, it is a time for our littles to recharge their minds and bodies as well. Whether they fall asleep during this time or not (and they might!), they are resting. Kids can get overstimulated from their day too and this structured, routine time of quiet can help them know what to expect each day, and can also be helpful in self-regulating emotions, and feeling more calm/less irritable. Quiet time is also a great way to enforce independent play. While playing independently, our children are becoming stronger problem solvers and increasing creativity and imagination.

Although quiet time is clearly making a great case for itself here, I think it can be easy to fall into a feeling of guilt. Some people may feel bad that they are not spending this time WITH their child. I get it, but also, you don’t need to feel bad for enforcing structure into your child’s day in a way that you know will benefit them (and you) greatly. You (or your child) cannot pour from an empty cup. Rest is an important way that we can all fill our cups up during the day so that we can be our best selves for the remainder of it.

Tips for Making the Initial Transition (From Nap to Quiet Time)

This is the part where I get to talk about what I did with my first, that I did not do with my second, and why I think it made such a difference. When Kade stopped falling asleep for naps, it was a struggle. He did not want to go into his room because he knew he was supposed to go to sleep and knew he wouldn’t be able to. He would rest for a bit and then I’d let him get up with no set time limit or routine involved. Eventually, he would refuse to even go to his room to rest. We didn’t have any sort of system in place or any sort of a plan. It was a battle that I got tired of fighting, so I stopped trying. DON’T STOP TRYING, if you can help it. Once we stopped doing any sort of “quiet time,” it was so difficult to re-implement it.

I eventually convinced him (this was after a year or two of either no quiet time at all, or struggling to make it happen) to give it a try by creating a special basket of quiet time activities that he could use during this time only and also by bribing him with fruit gummies (no shame). We started very small. I’m talking about 15 minutes, small. He had an okay to wake clock in his room (this is the one he had that worked great for him for years) that we used at bed time. I would set it for however long we decided and it would light up green during that time, and turn red when the time was up.

If he was successful to stay up in his room (insisted on having the door open - this was fine), on his own, playing quietly for the time given, he was rewarded by getting to spend some time on his tablet down on the couch in our main living space. We slowly increased the time, as he was succeeding and doing well, from 15 minutes, up to about an hour. It ebbed and flowed in terms of how often he’d either call for me or come down to see me. He went through phases where he did better than others, but for the most part, it worked for us for the time being and was MUCH better than nothing!

For awhile we would do about an hour of independent quiet time up in his room, and if he did well, he was rewarded by an hour of screen time after. This allowed me to have an hour of quiet, and then to still get things done around the house for the second hour.

Here Are a Few Things I Did Differently the Second Time Around…

There are two somewhat minor, logistical details that were different with Tatum than they were with Kade. We used a different okay to wake light that we started using during naps and STAYED CONSISTENT with using and following throughout, and a child-proof doorknob. Hear me out.

This is the okay to wake light that we have in Tatum’s room. It allows us to set a nap timer (Kade’s did this too) for however long we need and after the time is up, it will turn green. I’m sure you’re wondering what the difference is because yes this is the same exact thing that Kade had, it just looked different. The main thing with this is that I ALWAYS set it for 2 hours, every single day, for every single nap, as soon as she was old enough to start using the light and understanding the red light/green light concept (Kade didn’t have his during his naps - he only got it later on when he was waking up and coming in to our room way too early in the mornings).

This meant that she was to be in her room for “nap time” every afternoon until her light turned green, whether she was actually sleeping the whole time or not. This was just how we ran naps. When she was still consistently napping, she would often times take long enough to fall asleep that by the time she was waking, she either didn’t have much time left, or her light was already green. If she woke early, she was allowed to quietly look at books in her bed or just continue resting quietly.

Once her light turned green, she would call for me and let me know it was time to get up, and then I would come up and get her. As she got older, she was falling asleep less and less during this time, but we did not change a thing. The light was set for the same amount of time and the expectations were the same. She was encouraged to rest quietly, and if she couldn’t fall asleep, she was allowed to play quietly, but regardless, she was in her room until the light turned green.

In terms of the doorknob, we originally made the decision to child-proof her door when we first transitioned her to a big girl bed. We made this decision for safety reasons. Her bedroom is right at the top of our stairs, and we were not confident that she wouldn’t get up in the night and wander out into the dark hallway. We do close our kiddos’ bedroom doors at night, so we felt it was best to put one of these child-proof door knobs on to help keep her safe and give us peace of mind.

Little did we know at the time, that a decision we made for safety reasons, would end up being one of the biggest game changers for quiet time, too. It sounds cruel when you think of it out of context, like you’re locking your child in their room, but it is not like that at all and she does not see it that way either! Like I said, the main reason we started it was strictly for safety. She knows it’s there, it’s always been there, and it is to keep her safe. We also have a monitor on her every night and during every nap/quiet time that I’m able to talk back to her through, so if she ever needs anything she knows I’ve got an eye on her and she can just call for me.

As she has continued to grow and now rarely EVER falls asleep during a quiet time, I don’t really even tuck her into her bed anymore. The expectations are different. She is provided with open-ended toys and activities that she can use during this time, and she gets set up down on her floor where she can play. She still does lay down and rest her body but she also spends time being busy playing. Sharing more on these toys and activities in a bit so stay with me!

Although she is not sleeping during this time anymore, I’ve found that consistency is KEY. I continue to set her light for the same 2 hour time frame, I continue to help get her situated and comfy/cozy like I would for a nap (even if it’s on the floor with toys instead of tucked into bed), and I still close her door and turn on the monitor. Sometimes I even read her a book or two like I would before a nap as well to help her wind down and settle in.

My Best Tip for Achieving a 2 Hour Quiet Time

I want to start by saying that this tip is meant for kiddos who are truly transitioned to a quiet time (as opposed to still consistently falling asleep for naps). This is for that point when the expectations have shifted from “you need to try and fall asleep,” to “you don’t need to sleep, you just need to rest or play quietly.” When Tatum was still consistently falling asleep, I would allow her to look at books or do a simple quiet activity (like a water wow book) in her bed until she fell asleep, but now that she doesn’t fall asleep anymore, this is what we do instead.

We have a bunch of open-ended toys that we keep organized in clear bins in Kade’s bedroom closet (just because this is where we had space, and it’s not in our main living area or any of our main play spaces). His closet also holds some favorite puzzles and other activities that I like to give as options for Tatum (and Kade on weekends) to use during their quiet times.

Side note: You’ll also notice that Kade’s closet is where we keep all of our bigger puzzles which are not used for quiet times, extra games, and all of the kids’ dress-up costumes - also not used for quiet times. ;)

So before I help Tatum get settled in her room, she is allowed to come to Kade’s closet to pick 1-2 bins and/or activities to take into her room with her for that afternoon. Because these are toys that we don’t keep out regularly, this has been so helpful in keeping her busy and entertained for the full 2 hours.

Along with taking bins into her room, she also now listens to her Toniebox, which was a Christmas gift this past year, every afternoon. You can buy special characters to go along with the box and they play songs and/or tell stories that go along with the character (Tatum currently has Lion King, Peppa Pig, Elsa, Olaf, Going on a Bear Hunt, Little Mermaid, Daniel Tiger, and the Playtime Puppy that it comes with (this one plays tons of different fun kids songs). We store all of her characters in one of these small, clear zipper pouches.

She has a few other toys that she likes to use during this time and I’m going to share and link them all for you soon! It has been so fun for her to get to switch bins out each afternoon and it’s been a great way to utilize all of our open-ended toys. I do sometimes use these bins to rotate out toys in our main living space as well but I think the novelty of getting the toys all to herself in her bedroom (as opposed to in a playroom) during quiet time has been crucial for increasing independent play.

What’s in “The Bins?”

I’m going to start by sharing the toys/activities we have in the clear storage bins (these bins are great because she can see what’s inside of them, and I love that they have a lid so we can stack them on the shelf). After this list, I’ll share a link that will take you to all of our other favorite toys, puzzles, and activities.

Playstix
Wooden City Blocks
Pegs
Legos
Lincoln Logs
Alpha Pops
Squigz
Mrs. Potato Head
Melissa & Doug Wooden Stacking Train
Melissa & Doug Wooden Lacing Beads
Melissa & Doug Wooden See & Spell Puzzles
Farm + Farm Animals (ours is discontinued but this one is similar)
Letter Construction
Letter Tiles (Target Dollar Spot Find)
Characters (some examples of sets we have):
- Superheroes
- Daniel Tiger
- Paw Patrol
- Lion Guard
Wooden Trains Tracks & Accessories
Extra Wooden Tracks
Extra Wooden Trains
Tinker Toys
Plus Plus Big
Mini Magnetic Tiles
Colored Wooden Blocks
Flower Builders
Mini Animals
- Ocean
- Farm
- Jungle
Dinosaurs
- Mini Dinos
Gears
Bristle Blocks
Magnatiles
Safari Magnatiles
Jungle Magnatiles
Farm Magnatiles (not on Amazon but on Magnatile website)
Dino World Magnatiles (can also be found on Magnatile website)

Everything listed above from the clear bins, as well as all of our other favorite open-ended toys and activities for quiet times are all linked on this page here in my Amazon shop!

Favorite Open-Ended Toys & Activities for Quiet Times

You can also pin the image below to save these ideas and come back to the post later!

Quiet Time Wrap-Up

• Establish an effective nap time routine

• Remain consistent with the same routine when transitioning from naps to a quiet time

• Use a child-proof doorknob if applicable and if you think it could be effective and helpful for your little one

• Use a monitor that allows you to talk through it

• Use an “okay to wake” light and/or a visual timer to keep track of time

• If starting from scratch for quiet times (meaning you were not able to transition directly from naps into quiet times), remember that it’s okay to start small and work up to a longer timeframe - also don’t feel bad if you need to use a bribe when starting out ;)

• Use a device (like a Toniebox) that allows them to listen to stories or music

• Keep dedicated, open-ended toys and activities stored away somewhere that they don’t have regular access to and allow them to choose a couple of them to take into their quiet time space with them each day

Quiet times in the afternoons have been imperative to our day both for me and for my kiddos. I hope that these tips will be helpful for you when implementing something similar in your day! If you have any additional comments, or other things you’ve done that you’ve found success with, comment them below, and be sure to pin this post so you can come back to it later!